Tag: weighted

  • Rage or Intrigue (3/?)

    Rage or Intrigue (3/?)

    Intrigued. I always had an issue reaching people. Intrigued was often the only thing I could be. I attempted to cut a girl’s finger off with safety scissors in the first grade. I was quickly taken out of school and moved several hours away. Mother always defended me, like nothing…

  • Another face I had to look out for.

    Another face I had to look out for.

    Trigger Warning [Sexual Assault] “Why didn’t you tell us?” A colleague asked. All of my coworkers looking at me in a collage of horror and concern. We were all at lunch discussing the termination of a coworker for sexual assault, whom I had just offhandedly mentioned, between bites of food,…

  • I want to find her again.

    I want to find her again.

    I’ve always had these dreams. One’s in which I was visited by myself, in some past or present form. The first night after I moved out, I had a dream where I walked through nothing till I found my bedroom door. When I opened it, I found my little crying…

  • Alone but unafraid.

    Alone but unafraid.

    Harm, the destruction of self. To move on, one must carve out a space. Curate safety. Out of grasp from that which harms. They must take time: Process pain,   Regain self,     and repeat…       until they can broach out again. Afraid but willing. But how much is too much? How many…

  • Adrift.

    Adrift.

    Solitude is an intriguing and horrifying concept. The winter cold offers me little enjoyment, but I never regret how I spend my time during this season. I mean regret over time “wasted” is a constant interloper of mine, but it’s quieter in these months. Things have been quieter. No shame…

  • The last snake.

    The last snake.

    A mother’s love. Unwavering. An assurance. But what does that make of those who don’t receive? How does that affect the individual? The whole? Hating her doesn’t help; the harm was as much of a choice of hers as it is a snake after laying eggs. Abandonment, inherent. We are…